Dear Diary
by skittlesgirl99
Summary: Because the 77th Hunger Games were never filmed, citizens can never know exactly what went on in that arena. Katieya Mellark will only tell us that the arena was full of icing. But a primary source of a recount of the Games has been discovered, and, upon identifying its authenticity, has been released to the public domain. Written for the Starvation Monthly One-Shot Challenge. R


**An Entry from the Diary of Rosmerta Feln, Age 15, District 1, May 12****th**** 2402**

I'm slightly scared. But only just slightly so. I clearly won't be bringing this into the arena or even to the Capitol, so I'm documenting it all now. Tomorrow is the reaping. And I'll be volunteering. I know it's been so long since you heard from me, so you won't know much about me. And it's midnight, so I'll try to fill you in as much as possible, but don't expect much.

The rebellion failed. Katniss Everdeen is dead. To think that my idol is dead. _Dead_. She died at a public execution, too. How I always used to wish I could be like her. She was the hero of the rebels… But don't tell my parents I feel anything towards her or her children or her husband besides resentment. Oh, who am I kidding? You're just a book full of blank sheets of paper. You won't be telling parents anything.

Anyway, on to what I said before. I'm volunteering tomorrow. I know, I know, I'm finalizing my own death sentence, but I have to. If you knew what it's like in my District, you would too. Besides, no one will care when I'm gone. It's not like I have any _real _friends. My parents will say it's for the greater good. And my sister would surely be happy to have me gone.

Going on that last bit, I don't know what's been up with Annaren lately. She started being all different just a year ago. She shows nothing but contempt towards me. You may want to ask yourself—'What happened?' Well, my guess is as good as yours. Maybe the rebellion did something to her, but that was _two _years ago. And as I said before, she started being weird 12 months ago. That's a year.

I mean, we used to be so close. We did everything together. We were basically the perfect siblings. Something happened to her, and I wish I knew what it was. Was it me? No, she changed before I did. Though I suppose I'll never know. I'm quite aware I won't be coming out of that arena alive.

Oh, dammit (excuse my vulgar language)! I can hear mother coming to check on me! If she sees there's a light still on in my room, she'll beat the tar out of me. I have to turn the flashlight off, and I can't write in the dark. I'll have no time tomorrow to write anything, as well, so this is goodbye forever.

**An Entry from the Diary of Rosmerta Feln, Age 15, District 1, May 13****th**** 2402**

I know I said that I wouldn't bring this to the Capitol with me, but I needed to record all of this. Besides, once I'm in the arena, I won't be coming out, so I won't care if I leave you lying around anywhere. Also, I don't have a token besides this. Before Annaren left after giving a stiff goodbye, she handed me you and looked like she wanted to say something more, but couldn't bring herself to. I didn't mind, though. For a split second, it seemed like I had my older sister back. And for that I was happy.

Not to change the subject, but did you know that these Games won't be televised? Oh, the new President was very cunning about that. She knows that some of us won't hesitate to kill very gruesomely if we're not going to be seen. For my District partner, that would be true.

He scares me. His name is Astounce, he's eighteen years old, and he scares me. I don't want to be allies with him. And I'm sure I don't want to be allies with the rest of the Careers. Of course, I know I'll have to. They'll keep me alive until the right time comes and we all break apart, killing each other in the process. I won't win. But I already knew that.

**An Entry from the Diary of Rosmerta Feln, Age 15, District 1, May 20****th**** 2402**

It's been too long since I last wrote in you, but I've been busy with training and interviews. Since the audience can't see us in the arena, our sponsors rely solely on the interviews and the training scores, which I'm fairly certain I messed up on. I only just barely got in the Career range (an eight) for my score, and I'm just _positive _I was unmemorable in the interview. But that doesn't matter now, because we're in the arena, and it takes more than just sponsors to get you out of here. It takes skill. It takes skill which I lack.

Speaking of arenas, I don't think I've ever seen one quite like this. You see, the Gamemakers have fixed it to hit home for a certain female District 12 tribute named Katieya Mellark. She's the daughter of the late and great Katniss Everdeen. I'm going to have trouble killing her. Killing her… Who am I kidding? I've only killed one person so far, and today was the Bloodbath, and I'm a Career. I'm not even a good Career, at that.

But going on with the arena—it's a huge cake. It even has frosting and the Cornucopia is made out of icing. The notion of a cake arena would seem almost comical if the Games weren't so serious. The frosting is also a great hinder. We (the Careers and I) leave footprints everywhere we go, and we find we can't cover them up. A raid on our camp is going to happen if we're not careful.

The night is closing over us already. I can see the dead tributes' faces in the sky. Less than half of the tributes who came in remain, and we're hardly a day into these Games. The face of the boy I killed popped up just a moment ago. I couldn't bear to look at it. Zina, the eldest Career who is eighteen (going on nineteen) is patting me on the back as I write this. I'm the youngest, and she likes to dote on me. She reminds me a bit of Annaren (or how Annaren used to be), except Zina is more… intimidating.

It's probably past midnight, I don't have watch tonight, and I'll need my rest. I should set you down now, but I need to say one thing in case I die tomorrow. Whoever is reading this please let me get this message through: Never volunteer.

**An Entry from the Diary of Rosmerta Feln, Age 15, District 1, May 24****th**** 2402**

It's almost all over. They all died today. Well, not all of them. There's still one left. And her name is Katieya Mellark. Forgive me, though, for I have started too far into my story. I have once again left you for so long. Four days seems like an eternity.

The Careers disbanded this morning, when we all found out there was one tribute left. I didn't join in the fighting at all when it began. I sat in the shadows of the icing Cornucopia, hoping no one would notice me, and that later I would slip off into the woods, killing the others quickly. I actually had a scrap of hope for my survival at that point.

But when Zina won the fight, and the rest lay dead or dying, I knew something was wrong. She turned slowly, her eyes filled with bloodlust, and she saw me immediately. Her knife still had the blood of the others on it, and she raised it towards me as she approached.

At that moment, instinct kicked in. Without knowing what I was doing, I stuck my foot out and tripped her, while grabbing the knife from her hand and creating a deep, long slash in her stomach. I could tell she was in agonizing pain, but (though I wanted to) I couldn't stop there. I created two more just like the other wounds above and below the original. I took the knife and remaining supplies that I could carry with me, and I just left her there, screaming until the screaming stopped and she was dead. Oh, how I can I ever forget those screams?

The pictures are coming onto the night sky. That means I should sleep soon. I don't want to see Zina's face on the sky, knowing that I put it there.

**An Entry from the Diary of Rosmerta Feln, Age 15, District 1, May 25****th**** 2402**

Today is the last day I live. I don't mean to be pessimistic, but I'm going out to seek my own death once I finish writing this. Because after this, I am going to look for Katieya Mellark. She'll kill me for sure. Yes, I'm a Career (sort of), but that doesn't mean I'm suddenly better than she is. If she's been out this whole time on her own and she survived this long, that makes her better than me. I've been hiding behind the Career pack.

But I do what I have to do. I'll take the knife with me, and when we fight, it will seem like I'm winning, but I'll slip on the icing Cornucopia, and it'll all be over for me. She'll win. She'll win unless the icing is merciful towards me.

My fate lies in the hands of the icing… Well, that's not too terribly reassuring.

_Rosmerta died about an hour or so after she made the entry. She was killed in the exact same way that she predicted it would happen, and for this, some think that she planned it all. Some believe she couldn't handle being a victor, and so she purposely set up the icing trap. Her sister, Annaren, denies she would do something like that, despite the evidence of the girl spiraling into insane depression taken from her diary excerpts._

_Because the 77__th__ Hunger Games were never filmed, Rosmerta's primary resource is most likely the most reliable account we can get. The victor of these Games, Katieya Mellark, can confirm the events that happened, though she refuses to giver own details on them. Katieya now lives in District 12 with her father and younger brother. Annaren Feln has found it in her heart to forgive the victor for the death of her sister, and the two are in contact with each other…_

-An Excerpt from: The Silent Killer: A Complete History of the Hunger Games

**Dear Katieya,**

I can assure you, there's no need to worry about this. I already have half the teenagers from my District convinced to join us, and it sounds like most of your District would be more than happy to be rid of the Hunger Games. We'll try to recruit District 11 next, and then we'll move up the numbers. District 2 will probably be the hardest, but with eleven other Districts, it's going to be hard to refuse.

I wish District 13 wasn't _really _blown to smithereens and only pretending to be like in the last rebellion, but some wishes just don't come true. All the same, we'll do fine with 12 districts. Please stay in contact with me, and let me know when your District is ready to join the rebellion. I'll let you know when mine is.

By the way, I've been meaning to bring this up, but thank you for everything you've done. I actually don't know why I'm thanking you. I should hate you. You killed my sister. But I can't bring myself to. It's the Capitol's fault, not yours. I wish she was still here. Maybe if I had paid more attention to her, she would be. Can you believe I practically ignored her for a year before she volunteered? The things I used to do to be 'cool'. I'd rather have my little sister than my reputation, though.

Ah, now I have gotten tears on the paper. Forgive me if a few words are smudged.

**Best Regards,**

**Annaren**

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**A/N: Alright, thanks to all who have read up until this point. This one-shot was written for the Starvation Monthly One-Shot challenge. The prompt was: Icing.**

**The idea for ****The Silent Killer: A Complete History of the Hunger Games ****does not belong to me, though the excerpt does. The idea goes to MyrtleFalls, who got the idea from Cat lovers against the bomb.**

**Review, please!**


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